Chapter 27: Journal Entry 4

Journal Entry 4


Hey Journal –

I know its been a while since I’ve written anything. Tom came today, from England. My conversation with Roger didn’t go that great last night. We both went to bed tired and frustrated.

Anyway, about Tom. He seems really amazed that he’s actually here. Of course, today was the end of a very long day for him, so he may just be exhausted, who knows. We went to the airport and picked him up. It was me, Kaley, Jess, Angela, Steve, Christy and mom. And Megan. And Tom, of course.

We all headed back to my house and hung out in the sun room for a while because that was the only place all of us would fit, and I really didn’t want that crowd in my room. They might have found some of the more interesting objects hidden around, and I really didn’t want to explain the presence of those items.

After everyone left, Tom and I went into the pool. Tom did something that really broke the ice, so to speak, between us. We haven’t exactly been the closest people lately, but still friends. Anyway, he got on top of one of our little stools on the deck that was plastic, and he went to dive from it, and all of a sudden it broke underneath him because he was bouncing on it. He was okay, and it was the funniest thing in the world to watch. It was like snap! Crash! Splash! And then he surfaced looking bewildered.

Still no word from Roger. I think he shut off his answering machine so I couldn’t leave him messages. Or maybe it really did get full from all the stuff I left him over the past few days. Who knows? I hope he’s not mad at me. I swore to Tom that I would let him stay with me. Its not like its my fault that I have to keep my promises, you know? Roger would lose his respect for me if I had not let Tom stay with me. And the more important thing: I would have lost respect for myself.

Anyway, after our swimming and stool-breaking session, Tom and I grabbed some pizza and stayed up until around midnight talking and watching TV. He’s a really nice guy, but like I told Roger: I’m not attracted to him, nor have I ever been.

You know what I wish sometimes? I really wish that sometimes, just sometimes, our relationship (Me and Roger) could be one of those fairy tales, where the male is always forgiving and protective, never leaves the woman’s side, always ready to do anything for her. But if I’ve learned anything just over the past few months, it is that there is no Mr. Or Mrs. Right for you. I would love to think that, and maybe yes, fate has a lot to do with Roger and I. But, in the end, any relationship isn’t based on fate. Its based on the decisions you make. You know?

I’m exhausted. I’ll write more tomorrow if I get time. I am not really sure what we’re going to do tomorrow, but I’ll try to make writing more of a habit. I’ve been bad lately.

-Storm